9/4/2011

just sittin the depths of my mind, thinking of what could be
if i wasnt so alone, if i had you here with me,
what kind of person would i be, i know you would make me better
your soul completed mine , our vibes were intertwined like vines
of love in this jungle called life, with you i no longer feel the stresses or the
strife that being alone would bring along no longer isolated, no solitude
accompanied by your love and support my days are bright
and sunny, emotions become funny no longer controlled or surpressed
free to roam i feel so blessed so i dont mind expressing these things i kept inside for entirely to long, words and actions now exposed at higher levels, I've become so strong with you by my side it feels sublime a feeling of bliss and ecstasy i pray you never leave my side.

soul searching

So i guess i had to write these to help clear out some of the thoughts in my head... give me feed bck plz


Im stuck in this place between pain and pleasure
Every time she’s by my side there’s no feeling better
Yet she drives me insane with her constant nagging
Telling me how to live and how much time is passing
As I sit here in my room and live life secluded
Keeping distant from the world, no longer included
In society that she lives in, im in my own world
Filled with my dreams of success as a track runner
While surrounded with the goals to be the best tech
Makin money in the future, but now I have to stress
And live my life the best I can until my mission’s complete
And I’m the genius Olympian I dreamt to be.
But she brings me to reality everytime she’s around
Telling me how much she loves me but steady bringin me down
Keeping me confused , Unsure what to do
Should I leave her or keep her this decision keeps me stuck
In a state of delusion
Calamity, of the mind
Unfocused and wary, but ill b fine
But I'm Keeping my eyes focused, tunnel vision
Narrowing down each and every decision
Until I find the right path that makes me smile
And I hope you there with me so its all worthwhile.
-the righteous path


This disease has gotten worse as the generations pass
Lies increasing in this world, a true sign of weakness
Visions have be blurred due to the constant lies
So reality now distorted in the eyes of the youth
And the previous generation has no clue what to do
So they continue to live lies and pipe dreams they imagined
Causing the younger ones to follow blind and naïve as ever
Killing me inside to see such pain
As I see my loved ones stuck in this state
I wish I could eliminate the deception in this world
So the truth remained alone, the lone wolf of the world
But alas, life has not deemed me with such powers
I am but a simple man who observes and assist with each problem
Hoping that I can cure each being one by one
And that this chaos of lies will one day be undone
-Fabrications

INSOMNIA

Late night/early morning writing.... maybe i can get sleep now..... read and comment

No longer able to sleep at night for reason’s unknown
So I sit around alone and I begin to ponder
Thinking about the my goals and my dreams and my ambitions in life
Where I’ve been, where I’m at, where I’m going later in life
Insomnia is my disease and it’s causing me to think
About the path that I’ve chosen, is it really meant for me?
Am I to continue down this road to achieve my acclaimed greatness?
To reach my goals I put forth, is this current focus?
The more Questions that appear the longer I’m awake
And as each different situation arrives my mind becomes more awake
Each feeding each other causing me to never fall asleep
My body getting weaker from this lack of rest
Feeling less superhuman now my strength may be at its peak…
My pattern in life is screwed, no longer the norm
There is no end to the questions in sight, only one option right now
I have to search deep within to find the issue at hand
To conquer this feeling inside that keeps me awake
So that my body can finally recover, regain some energy once more
And my brain can rest as I regain my clear picture of the future in my mind
-insomnia
b.Jonez

my soul

hey another one for my lovely followers ... i think yall will like this one ... please leave some feedback i need to know what you think thanks and love yall
I continue to think of what could have been
Of the time we could have spent
Of the live I thought were meant
To be between me and you
Every thought that I had gave me hope with you
And I assumed that you felt the same
The love that we shared had me so amazed
I was shocked I thought I found my other half in you
And it had me so happy, you were my soul food
You kept me whole, complete no longer empty
When you said “I love you” my heart skipped a beat
Thought I was gonna die when you said that because of what u meant to me
You had me dreaming about a female, I feel like such a fool
Because now I feel that you said that with no meaning boo
Now my heart has this gap, this pain inside
And no medicine in this world could relieve my hurt
I just wanted to be with you, to make u happy love
But I see im not good enough to be in your world
I’m just another nigga I guess, in your eyes
I said I would but I guess that’s not what you want
Your free spirit can’t be contained you want to explore some more
And it kills me to think of anyone else by your side
But if it makes you happy then I must oblige
And allow you to live how you want to live
Guess I’ll watch from the side as you do you
My heart is now so empty and it’s starting to show
I isolate myself from the world because I see no point
To be around people that just may hurt me again
I’ll just stay alone and contemplate things
Try to figure out the path that I’m meant to take
What is my point in life, what is my life’s goal?
I’ll continue to live this way till I find someone
Who can fill the void that you left behind.
-lonely soul

happiness

Yea this is a long one.. but im sure you all will like it .... please read


The clothes that I wear run you away...
Or maybe the way I wear my hair out keeps u away
Could be the ‘me’ in general makes u not want to stay?
Whatever it is u can’t explain why u no longer feels me
Why your vibes have changed so hard when u thinks about me
Things seemed to go so well but I guess I was deceived
To thing a woman great as you would want to be seen with me
Guess I’m not up to Ur standards, Ur material ones
My sweats and my shoes aren’t the best ones
But I like how I live and I thought u did too
You love the way I write and my skills and my brains
You said I was kind of cute and my body was fine
But I just don’t match your style when it comes to being seen
Your clothes game is on top, never slacking wit your footwear
While I struggle to get new things, always the same sweats but I don’t care
It didn’t bother you as much since I told u I’m an athlete
And that I work out every day, so you thought it was needed
Guess it was too much for you though, to be seen with me
To been seen with a ‘bum’ who was ‘dressed’ to be seen
Whose hair was just too much and you wanted it off
But I told you that I couldn’t its part of my life
Yea I was just messing but I was serious too
But you took it to heart that I wasn’t including you
Which is absurd because you were the one in my eyes
All I could think of, you were just so right
But I guess I wasn’t for you, since I wouldn’t conform to your ways
The demands to do so much when I was tired from working so hard
U called me lazy for just lying there, like I wasn’t tired at all
Like I didn’t just spend 8 hrs. Working plus practice, no I’m not tired at all
I force myself up just to go spend time with you, walking the mall holding you bags and buying things for you
Just to keep u happy when u ask for my company, I know it’s not much so I do it with you
Whatever you need me too, I try my best to do
Which leaves me so confused, so baffled right now
Why is it you no longer feel for me if I did everything for you?
Is it cuz I couldn’t keep up in the way I dress myself
Or is it cuz I kept my hair when u asked me to cut it off
I just don’t understand… how you could just leave me so alone
I thought you were the one things were going so right
But I guess it’s my naivety when it comes to being with someone
How I can’t read between the lines, guess that caused my downfall
Well back to being alone….the life im so used to…
The life of me myself and I, my music and my writings
The only things that keep me sane in this chaotic world…
Till I find someone who accepts me, for just being me
-questforhappiness

transformation

Honestly i dont think many people will like this one but i put everythin i write on my blog ..so read and be honest with you feedback plz
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Fuck it all, I’m tired of the bullshit
Pretending to be this nice man,
façade is so foolish;
Turning back to the man that I once was,
Who just didn’t give a fuck, no matter who it was
Time to start crushing innocent souls,
Causing their minds to fold;
Succumbing to the pressure that I no longer hold
Within, darkness has taken over
The sun has been eclipsed, it’s eternally black
No light in my heart now, no longer a crack
Just an empty vessel containing one emotion, anger
Everywhere I go I cause nothing but danger
And pain, chaos and anarchy set in
To all victims in my path that’s just how it is
Just avoid me if you can cuz I’m instilling fear
Inside ya souls, destroying all that you hold dear
The once kind being is gone, no longer to be used
Corrupted by the ones close, over-abused
Has subsided within and let the beast out
Watch ya back world I have no restraints I’m causing pain, it’s the only route.
-transformation

Waiting

Hope it’s me that you miss when u change your status
Hope it’s me that’s on your mind whenever u mention “him”
Hope that I am the one that keeps you happy
Hope that I am the one that keeps u pleased
All I can do is assume that I’m doing my job.
Keep going off my vibes that I’m performing well
All I have are you emotions that you show oh so well
But like any other female you could just be playing some game
Thinking that just because u think I’m happy it’s all the same
But the truth is I can tell deep in my soul
When you’re frustrated, irritated, annoyed to a point
Where your about to lose control
And snap on the world and express to me your true emotions
Tell me why you’re hurting and why your heart is in so much pain
Because all this assuming and guessing is driving me insane
So I patiently wait for the day when you’re ready
To tell me how your heart feels, so once again it can beat steady
-B.Jones